Saturday, January 9, 2010
Thorn and Fox returned from Florida this afternoon. Meeting them at the airport was one of the happiest things I've ever done. I thought my boy would cry when he saw me. I thought I would have become a "stranger" to him, but I hadn't. He didn't know me right away, but he soon figured out who I was. He held my face, touched my beard, and eventually gave me one of his shy smiles. This evening I got a much larger smile when I smiled at him, and I even made him laugh a few times. It was only ten days, but it felt longer. I don't think I could have handled more than ten days. I barely made it through the ten. I used to imagine myself a lonesome fellow. I used to think I'd live alone more readily than with someone, but I've been with Fox for ten years now, and I am just not a complete person when she isn't around. I'm like someone in a shadow world, shuffling along, not sure of anything, confused, dazed. I'm glad she's back, and I'm glad Thorn is back. The work increases now, but it is good work, welcome work. Vitam meam amo.